A few weeks ago, I told you about the doubt our friends had when my wife and I got married. The thought because we met at school in the military, our marriage couldn’t possibly last more than 2 years. They were wrong. We have been happily married for 44 years.
It occurs to me that I neglected to tell you why it lasted. It lasted for several reasons.
- We didn’t allow a piece of paper to dictate our feelings and trust for each other. Our marriage wasn’t the next logical step toward a married life. Our marriage was based on getting to know one another by talking daily and telling each other honestly how we felt. By talking instead of partying, we were able to come to an honest understanding of how each of us wanted our marriage to be. In other words, we had to have faith in each other just as we must have faith in God that He will love us more than we love Him.
- Our love for each other must be loyal. Marriage is a two-way street. The Husband and Wife can’t both be the same way. Each person must have their own personality and they must use that personality to help guide the marriage in the way it should go. If both parties have the same exact personality, marriage would be boring. You would be doing the same things all the time and that would get old. By being different, there is enough diversity to make the marriage interesting and fun.
- The same is true with our relationship to God. We don’t have a ritualistic relationship with God where we go to church on Sunday and put money in an offering plate to impress someone. We don’t run to the alter every time there is an alter call. After I surrendered my life to God, everything after that is between, he and I. I don’t need to put on a show so others can see that I have faith in God. If I humbly walk in the manner described in the bible for me to walk, people can see Christ in me.
- One of the hardest things for me to learn over the years was modesty in our marriage. I keep trying to impress my wife and show her that I can run things and keep our marriage running smooth. My wife has a subtlety about her that very gently smacks me back in my place when it is needed. One person can’t run a marriage, it takes a combined effort. Both sides of the couple must use all modesty in their dealings with each other; just as we must use modesty in our dealings with God.
To sum up what I have just said. To have a happy marriage you must both have faith in each other, you must both learn to act justly toward each other and help each other always. You must both have a “loyal love” toward each other just as Micah instructed the Children of Israel that they must do toward God. That is a love that will recognize the mercy that your spouse is showing you and learn to appreciate it. And finally, you must walk humbly with your spouse and allow your spouse to be a great influence in your life.